Trumble

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Revision as of 13:41, 8 April 2022 by Cholmondely (talk | contribs) (Added picture!)
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Overview

Opinions differ whether Trumbles are pleasant and affectionate pets whose presence can be soothing to their owner's psyche, or rather the most annoying and disadvantagous vermin to have one's spaceship be cursed with. It's not, however, unlikely that the former opinion has been hyped by the the PR department of the alleged creators and current Trumble™ genetic copyright holders GenFun, and to most shipowners, the only good Trumble is a sun-scorched Trumble.

Availability

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Due to a recent enterprising marketing campaign by GenFun, Trumbles™ can be found for sale on a galactic scale.

It would seem improbable that the Trumble's incredible rate of reproduction is of intentional design, but losing profit because of this trait never being an option, GenFun's aggressive strategy has shown current sales to be as efficient as Trumble procreation.

An auspicious space-gift


As a consequence of this hypermarketing, abandoned Trumble™ shipments can occasionally be found drifting in space. It is unknown if this frequent occurrence is simply due to pirates who destroy the freighters and upon looting, selectively ignore these cargopods, or if it is, somehow, another devious tactic of GenFun's marketing scheme.

Origins

Although GenFun insists to have, single-handedly, sculpted this creature around an amoebic basis, substantial numbers of reknowned scientists claim this to be fraudulent, believing Trumbles to be natural children of the cosmos. Neither contention has the support of conclusive evidence (the explosion of their Ensoreus labratories being GenFun's convenient alibi), and GenFun's legal claim is based chiefly on an early, primitive genetic sketch patent application filed as Organism C-64.

Org. C-64


Trumble™ project's lead geneticist Dr. Rip Purefoy was at the forefront of the GenFun legal offensive, being fond of pointing out that the swollen proportions of the Trumble™'s left eye was his "personal signature" (which consumer testing proved to be a hypnotic and instantly endearing characteristic), up until his unexpected tragic demise in the Ensoreus disaster.


The truth of the Trumble origin continues to be murky.

Pet Care

GenFun assures its customers that caring for a Trumble™ requires minimal effort. They will thrive without nourishment for extensive periods, and exist comfortably within a wide range of temperatures. Traders of organic goods should note that GenFun will take no responsibility for loss of profit in the unlikely event that the pets gain access the cargo hold, unless the official Trumble-Cage™ is purchased. These are ridiculously expensive, and have become difficult to find on account of the high demand.

Trumble.gif

Recipes

De-furred. Butchered to yield a nice tenderloin cut, season with pink ocean salt and ground zero-G black pepper. Put it in a pan with some Anarlquian chili's, and a tablespoon or two of Lavian Tree Grub oil (or other low-fat oil). Brown the 4 sides of the loin, and then place the whole in the oven at 350º until it reaches 165º internally.

In a separate pan, put some dehydrated Reidquatian Mangos (julienned), a can of guava juice, and some caradamon and allspice. Simmer till the juice is 1/3 the original volume. Spoon over the slices of the tenderloin and serve. (Cmd. Cheyd (2009))

Links